Tonight, I write, because I am feeling a little bit blue.
I don't really like to write or dwell too much on things that bother me,
but sometimes it's nice to try to pin point exactly what is it that is bothering me.
Perhaps I am tired because I did not sleep that well last night.
Perhaps it could be that I am just feeling a little bit drowned at work.
Perhaps it could also be that I am so busy I don't have the time for myself.
May I am just tired because I am always chasing something, a goal, and for once, I would just like to take it easy, and bum around for a bit. Except there is just always something to be done, I just don't have the luxury to just laze for a day or two.
Maybe I keep thinking about things I can do, how I can do better, if there is something that can be done more efficiently.
I want to do more, I want to be more, personally and professionally.
But really, when I scrutinize my goals, it is very generic. Perhaps that's why I am constantly searching, and chasing a goal, because I have yet to be satisfied. Fair enough, for I look around me, and I see people achieving so much more.
So many perhaps why I am not feeling my usual happiness, but then looking at the points above, I realise hey, I just got back from Bali, four awesome days of doing niks.
Then, hey, I see now that yes, I am always chasing something and always thinking of areas to improve, and see - how far I have gone, how much I have done!
Ok, maybe I am just a little bit nervous with the conference drawing near, and I need to keep my act together. Maybe this experience is teaching me to multi-task even more, and to focus at what I am doing, so I get to do more, with a shorter time.
One thing is for sure - I shall definitely get through the next two weeks a stronger, more experienced person!
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