Sunday, June 15, 2008

Friday the 13th, June 2008

Friday June 13, 22.21 hours

Over the past few days I’ve come to realize my greatest fear; loneliness. I have always thought that I am a pretty independent person. I mean, I have gone to Europe myself, I shop alone at times, I am not even afraid of driving home alone late at night. Yet, coming here to Singapore, over the past few days, I realize that I really need to constantly be around people to be happy. I find myself getting really nervous when I am alone, and I really do wonder where have my strength gone? I must say that I used to be a lot more stronger when I was in high school; perhaps it was my lack of friends at school that taught me to be strong for myself.

So here I am now, Friday night, 2229 hours alone in room 0835, Grand Mercure Roxy Hotel, Singapore. Sam’s upstairs with her family (they’ve come down for the weekend weeee !). No, she didn’t ditch me, I chose to stay downstairs myself, I think its HIGH TIME that I start growing out of this ‘I am scared of Loneliness’ nonsense. I know I can be a lot braver, and a lot stronger, I just need to find my strength, that ‘s all. I have the TV on for company (Supernatural’s on) and my good old Nokia by my side. I am very tempted to pick up the phone and call anyone just to chat !

Ohhh wait! Sam’s back!! Gonna chat with her now, will try to blog more, miss ya’ll.

Big kisses,ping

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